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lindsayann17
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Name: lindsay ann
Interests: one day i want to ride a dolphin like this cement one at the esplanade. riding cement dolphins ends up looking dirty...but i know that no one will be snickering when i'm riding a real dolphin!
Occupation: Student
Industry: Retail
Message: message me
Website: visit my website
AIM:  shortandshiny
Member Since:
1/5/2004
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| change is so, so good. i don't ever want to trick myself into thinking that i've grown up or that i'm somehow better than i used to be, but i am so blessed that i didn't have to stay the way i was.
i've had some good times. i've had some bad times. i might have a few more years ahead of me. i guess we'll see. everything is an adventure.
speaking of adventure, xanga is like an old friend who went through some changes of his own...and now that i come back and stare him in the eyes again, i wonder if maybe i might be able to love him again. not that it really matters, because it's been too long and the person i am now could not feasibly be with the person he is now. wait. am i talking about xanga? or a high school ex-boyfriend? so hard to tell sometimes.
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francis chan mentioned something this morning about how people
overuse the phrase 'my heart breaks for ______'. he said that when you
really experience that, when you really feel your heart breaking on
someone else's behalf, you want to take back every other time you've
ever said it. once your heart really breaks for someone, you know that
you have never felt true sympathy before in your life.
and i think tonight might be one of the first times i've felt it. | | |
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daylight savings time just ended. i'd like to think i stayed up
just to watch that happen, but it's not really the case. i stayed
up because i got 12 hours of sleep last night and i get restless when
i'm home anyway. dangerous combination.
here's the good news. i think that the elizabethtown soundtrack
can be my new inter-home drive music. i am highly selective when
it comes to such music, because it really has to be the perfect
combination of upbeat and thoughtful and lovey and lifey and beachy and
oxnardy. because the trip between santa barbara and camarillo is
just...so...emotional. previous winners of this honor: something
corporate, donavon, jack, the format, shawn mcdonald, and eisley.
and that's it. so i'm officially adding elizabethtown to the list
of approved home-drive mixes.
my dad saved my life tonight. i love him so much. i really
needed to be home and not in santa barbara (aka sodom) this
weekend. it's so not my deal, and the partying is
so...pervasive? i suppose...
so much trailing off.
i absolutely hate dead baby jokes. some people have seen my
reaction to them. i'm just reiterating it. hate.
dead. baby. jokes.
i went over to the boys' house tonight but it
just wasn't enough. i could say more about that, but i think i'll
stop the emo truck.
it's funny how a single question can trigger so much in me...funny how
i've spent the last three hours thinking about my answer...oh life...
I've
had some time to think about you and watch the sun set like a
stone. I've had some time to think about you on the long ride home...
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| shopping = beautiful dress for president's ball (uhm, yeah, i'm
going?), new perfume (clinique happy to be, a name i find quite
appropriate), lusting after keds all over the place, discovering that
jen and i have the exact same shoe taste, taking pictures in the
dressing rooms.
chipotle = true conquering of my former issues
with the place. although it's not my preference for mexican food,
especially out of all the taquerias in s.b., i feel like chipotle and i
can finally hang out and be amicable.
elizabethtown = amazing
movie. better than garden state, okay? yeah. i said it. good actors,
good music, good comedy, good love story, good action, good screeching
little boy, good quotable lines, and i saw it with good friends. can you beat it? no!
oh
yeah...and i might be a little extra-stoked on life due to the fact
that i quit my job today. wednesday is my last day...woo hoo! | | |
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if i started writing about the miracles i have experienced in the past
few days, this entry would be 87 feet long...and i would be
paraphrasing like four chapters out of 'the ragamuffin gospel' and just
telling you things i've learned 100 times about prayer and about the
faithfulness of the Lord and about so so so much.
i love westmont and you can all laugh at me for days, but it's good news.
"The Lord
is calling me...affirming me, enabling me, encouraging me, challenging
me all the way into fullness of faith, hope, and love in the power of
His Holy Spirit. Ignorant, weak, sinful person that I am, with
easy rationalizations for my sinful behavior, I am being told anew in
the unmistakable language of love, 'I am with you, I am for you, I am
in you. I expect more failure from you than you expect from
yourself.' "
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